The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.
Pema Chodron
Resilience has become a buzzword for suffering in silence. The root of “resilience” is the Latin “resilire” “to jump back,” “to recoil,” In the physical sciences, it’s “elasticity, returning to original shape after compression” The word has been hollowed out, stripped of meaning. We’re told to be elastic bands – stretch, snap back, repeat. But rubber bands eventually break from overuse.
I have an edgier take –resilience is a relationship. With oneself, with resources. It’s not about having thicker skin; it’s having better boundaries. Not enduring more; it’s choosing differently.
It’s the art of creative scarcity – Ask for help, delegate, stop doing low-value stuff, stay calm in turmoil or try a different approach.
What can you do with what you’ve got, not what you wish you had.
The silence buried in “resilience” isn’t an etymological accident – it’s the quiet revolution happening when we stop pretending we’re unbreakable and start admitting we’re constantly becoming.
How do we shift rather than return?
Growth isn’t elastic.
Life rarely lets us recoil to who we once were.
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Notice how in these examples, the focus is on their relationship to resources around them. There was no bounding back.
I will get educated
A high school student with no home internet writes essays on a smartphone, borrows library computers during breaks, or walks to a café with Wi-Fi just to submit assignments — refusing to let lack of tools block their education.
Starting Over
A newly arrived immigrant with limited English takes multiple odd jobs, learns the language at night through YouTube and uses community bulletin boards to find work — building a life from scratch with grit and ingenuity.
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More Wellbeing Ideas
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More on Resilience
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Why is Costa Rica such a Happy Place?
We have a few more spots for our upcoming Wellness Week in Costa Rica. For more info, go here.
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Eileen participating in the Infinite Health Summit with
Lynn Misch on the topic of Occupational “Burnout” Register Here
Stay Well,
Eileen
Wonderful thoughts! Thank you for your wisdom in these troubling times!
I love your “edgier take” on resilience ,Eileen and these examples are awesome! Thank you