You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. –Maya Angelou
As I was going into labor with my first son, I called a friend to let her know it was “go time.” She gave me advice that has stayed with me for twenty-eight years.
“Remember to keep your palms open during the delivery.”
I followed that simple instruction — and what it did was relax my entire body. When the palms are open, it sends a signal: I am open to whatever is happening. I am not in charge. No birth plan. No expectations. Just stay open and present.
I’ve carried that advice into every hard moment since — an achingly tender funeral, a difficult conversation, a knee replacement, messy family dynamics. In each one, open palms were the quiet reminder to stop gripping and start receiving. It is the opposite of white-knuckling it.
The world is going to do what it does.
You can fight it with a fist — or meet it with an open hand.
Your choice.
Every single time.
Other Wellbeing Ideas
The Meadow 
Two years ago, our neighbor asked if we wanted to create a pollinator meadow on the strip of grass between our homes. Turns out, it was a fantastic idea. No mowing, no maintenance — just a constantly changing riot of color and insect activity. It has genuinely enhanced my sense of wellbeing in ways I didn’t expect.
Grateful for thoughtful neighbors.
The Intelligence of Plants
We now know that trees share vital resources, warn each other of danger, and nurture young saplings. Time-lapse photography has made visible what we couldn’t see before — something that looks remarkably like intention. Maybe intelligence isn’t just a human trait.
Best Advice for how to Spend, Better
Stay Well, Eileen
