“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.” —MARCEL PROUST
Most of us learned conflict styles in childhood and never questioned them. Thomas & Kilmann’s model reframes everything: there are no bad conflicts, only inflexible responses. Two questions cut through the noise —
How much does this problem matter to me?
How much does this relationship matter?
Those answers tell you whether to compete, collaborate, compromise, accommodate, or step back entirely. Someone grieving and lashing out? Accommodate. A core values violation? Stand firm. The wisdom isn’t in always fighting or always folding — it’s knowing which move serves the moment.
Wellbeing Ideas
The World, one Window at a Time
OpenWebcamDB is a hand-curated, ad-free directory of over 1,600 live camera streams from 59 countries — every feed verified for quality before it goes up. Drop in on a panda enclosure in Chengdu, a canal lock in Germany, a falcon nest in Australia, or a street corner in Kraków. No algorithm, no ads. Just the planet, unfiltered.
How to Tolerate Hassles
A great read on how to use Acceptance and Commitment therapy on YOURSELF. It reduces the suffering. Worth a read if you accumulate stresses that are avoidable (i.e., react to what others are doing/not doing!)
Inside a Tawny Owl Nest
Stay Well, Eileen
I really love the questions to ask yourself during conflict! So smart.
HI Meghan: Right? If only we had known this earlier- Hoping all is well with you and the family.
Thought-provoking as always! In my career, I mediated countless employment discrimination cases. I often encountered resistance to settling these cases because each party thought they were in the right. I can’t tell you how many times I had to remind litigating parties of the importance of collaboration and compromise to avoid further damage to the employment relationship.
I can only imagine what you saw an an employment judge- when people stay fixed in their position. That must been so difficult to witness.